Why is gossip so enticing? The more we speak, the more likely we are to gossip. This is a looming risk when we interact with the people pleaser.
The people pleaser often speaks and thinks later. We need to be careful not to do the same. Gossip is unnecessary talk about others. It often includes untrue statements (slander) as well as true statements that are confidential. Solomon said: “A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much” (Proverbs 20:19). He likened gossip to throwing wood on a fire: “Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down” (Proverbs 26:20).
Gossip offers deceptive pleasure because it attempts to satisfy our desire for significance — apart from Christ. Solomon recorded: “The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s most innermost parts” (Proverbs 26:22). We either lift ourselves up or bring others down through gossip. We must be careful not to do so when we engage with a people pleaser. Even if we nod in agreement, the people pleaser will quote us to his next audience as the perpetuator of the rumor at hand.
The next time you encounter a people pleaser, connect with his heart by avoiding gossip. In his heart, the people pleaser desires significance apart from Christ and leads with his emotions. Do not assume that his gossip is true, and do not perpetuate a conversation that breaches confidence. Be careful not to nod your head in agreement to gossip nor utter, “Uh huh.” Remember that without wood a fire goes out, without gossip a quarrel dies down (Proverbs 26:20).
Episode 78: Leading the People Pleaser Through Listening from mitchkrusetv on Vimeo.