Can you honestly say that you love your offender? How do we truly let go of resisting blessing our enemy horizontally in relationships?
We wish our enemy well before others. First, we love our enemy by serving them in order to meet a legitimate need in their life. This love fulfills the Law: “In everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 7:12). Second, we pray for them when we are with a close confidant with whom we share most of our walk with Christ. If prompted by the Holy Spirit, we then pray with our offender that God would bless them in the same way that we have asked God to bless us. All of this is prerequisite to, not a result of, reconciliation. This treats our offender differently than we were treated which exhibits the humble, forgiving, and wise heart of Christ rather than the proud, unforgiving, and foolish heart that is opposed to Him (see Matthew 5:46-47).
During the next week, love your enemy by discovering a need that you can meet. It might be a house that needs cleaned, leaves that need raked, children that need watched, clothes that need replaced, a car that needs repaired, a vendor that needs to be recommended, or a potential customer that needs referred. Ask your mutual walk partner in Christ to pray with you in order to bless your offender. After serving your offender, if prompted by the Holy Spirit, humbly pray with them requesting God’s blessing in their life.
Continue to practice the instant forgiveness experiment. When someone sins against you, instantly let go of the four prison walls of revenge, resentment, regret, and resisting blessing. Do this by humbling your heart to Christ in you. He is complete in His love for all, including your enemies (see Matthew 5:48; cf. Luke 6:36; Deuteronomy 18:13).